Position/Order

Does it really matter what birth position you hold?  Were you an only child, firstborn, middle, or youngest?  Does it matter?  Does it influence the person you become as an adult?

I had always thought it did.  I was firstborn and felt that position held responsibility which caused a person to grow-up faster.  I considered myself an adult at age 12.  That was also the year that I became a real member of my church and that seemed to me an adult behavior.  I had a lot of psychology in college and there were strong views expressed that birth order was an indisputed influence. Our family heads, parents, both worked outside the home and my two sisters and I had a series of housekeepers or nannies or sitters or whatevers which was OK with all of us.

My just younger sister, however, felt that, as the middle child, she was fighting for a voice most of the time.  Even experts seem to all feel that, if birth order does mean anything, it means the most to the middle child.
My sister grew into an extremely successful teacher with a great mind for facts and an ability to interact with just about anyone.

The youngest of us may be the most likely to prove the birth order influence.  She was extremely opposed to authority when very young and continued to question authority throughout her life.  She lives a unique life, but appears to be very satisfied with it.

I look back on the last few paragraphs and see that I do believe in the birth order influence.  Isn't it interesting that just "talking" with you clarifies so much?  Well, I suggest that you consider experts rather than my opinions.  I have two with opposing views which, I hope, will help you to reach your own decision.

Mr. Frank Sulloway feels that your birth order influences as much as your gender.  He wrote "Born to Rebel:  Birth Order, Family Dynamics and Creative Lives".  He briefly outlines the traits of the basic positions as:  first born identifies with parents and are more conformist as adults.  The younger are prone to challenge authority as a ploy to gain attention and this continues into adulthood.

The other side of this question is Mr. Dalton Conley who wrote "The Pecking Order" and says "birth order makes about as much sense as astrology, which is almost none." He feels that other factors such as a death in the family, financial difficulties, gender expectations, family roles and other random events are much more influential.

Ok, we have two authority figures if we want to go into a research situation.  There are Many researchers  available for both views, but, here are general traits of each birth position.  You can decide for yourself.
The following are my summary of the generally accepted traits of each position.

Only children:  Great deal like the first born, but on turbo.  They are extremely responsible and like to do everything perfectly.  They usually get along with people who are older.  Some names we know who were only children are Robert de Niro, Elton John and Robin Williams.

First Born:  These are goal setters, usually the most successful of the siblings, perfectionists and worriers. Some presidents were first born Truman, Johnson, Carter and George W. Bush.  Several news anchors Walter Cronkite, Peter Jennings, Dan Rather and Ted Koppel.

Middle Children: Tend to rebel, be competitive, are flexible, peacemakers and highly social.  We will recognize two rather prominent and successful middle children in David Letterman and Donald Trump.

Youngest:  Feel they can do no wrong because they are usually spoiled by family, are risk takers , love attention, they are creative and usually have a good sense of humor. They can also be manipulative, persistent and frequently have problems with substance abuse and psychiatric disorders. Some well-known last borns are Ross Perot, Goldie Hawn, Jim Carrey, Jay Leno and Steve Martin.

The people who strongly feel birth order is key to personality analysis have some caveats they feel will alter order rules:

If there are several years between siblings, the birth order starts over.
A difference in gender causes the 1st born of the next gender to have traits of first born
Deaths of siblings, adoptions, step-siblings and divorce which causes siblings to live separately will influence order traits.

I cannot give much experience-driven information.  I had one child and the attempt to help her grow with as few traits of the "only" is the hardest and most wonderful work I have ever done.  It is work to raise a child.
It is exhausting, stressful, uncertain, thrilling and frequently indescribably frightening, but the rewards last a life time.  Please enjoy your life....every day.  It is what you make it!